WHILE YOU WERE WATCHING THEM MOO
What Parliament Actually Did This Week
Think MPs just moo at each other all day?
Apparently not.
Stuff does get done - just not usually as performance art for the cameras.
So while everyone else was watching the political theatre, we went looking at what Parliament actually did.
Here’s what you might have missed.
THE IMPORTANT STUFF
The BBC is approaching a fork in the road
This week, the Culture, Media and Sport Committee published its report on the future of the BBC.
The next Royal Charter will determine how the BBC is governed, regulated and funded from 2028 onwards, and the committee thinks some fairly substantial changes are needed.
Among them: keep universal funding, but find more commercial income; stop political appointments to the BBC board; give the BBC an explicit role in tackling misinformation; and think rather harder before spending licence-fee money competing with commercial broadcasters for certain types of programmes.
Among those the MPs specifically mentioned were Suits, Schitt's Creek and - I am absolutely delighted that this was committed to the parliamentary record - Scooby-Doo!
The Government is now working on its proposals for the next Charter.
This is one of those complex, slow-moving decisions that won't generate much excitement until the subject of the licence fee rears its ugly head again.
Definitely worth watching. Pun intended.
MEANWHILE, IN COMMITTEE ROOM 6...
£233 million. Gone by lunchtime.
The Sustainable Farming Incentive pays farmers and land managers to do things intended to protect the environment, support food production and improve productivity.
This year's application window had a budget of £233 million.
Defra said applications would remain open until the money had been allocated.
That took less than six hours.
The Environment, Food and Rural Affairs Committee is now asking farmers what happened - including those who successfully got an application in and those who didn't.
There may be perfectly good explanations for why demand so dramatically exceeded the available funding. But when a £233 million government scheme opens in the morning and is effectively sold out before you've finished your lunch, somebody probably ought to ask a few questions.
Fortunately, somebody has.
Source: UK Parliament, Environment, Food and Rural Affairs Committee, 1 October 2026.
BORING BITS THAT MIGHT ACTUALLY CHANGE SOMETHING
Property management agents may finally get a regulator
If you own a leasehold property in England, the people managing your building can have considerable influence over your service charges and how your home is run.
There is currently no overarching statutory regulator for property managing agents.
Parliament's Housing Committee recommended changing that.
The Government has now accepted the case for an independent regulator, while the Prime Minister has committed to introducing the Commonhold and Leasehold Reform Bill by Christmas.
There is still plenty unresolved - including ground rents and exactly what powers any regulator would have - but this is a useful example of the bit of Parliament we rarely see. A committee investigates something, it makes recommendations, and government eventually says yes without shouting across the chamber.
Source: UK Parliament, Housing, Communities and Local Government Committee, 1 October 2026.
WELL, THAT TOOK A TURN
Manchester City has wandered into the Treasury Committee
You might reasonably have assumed the Premier League's investigation into Manchester City had relatively little to do with Parliament.
Dame Meg Hillier, Chair of the Treasury Committee, thinks differently.
Following publication of a Premier League report finding well over 100 breaches of its rules across multiple seasons, Hillier has written to HMRC asking whether it has obtained the unredacted report and whether any of the findings have tax implications.
She has also asked what HMRC is doing more broadly about taxation of remuneration and potential tax avoidance within football clubs.
To be clear: the committee has not established that Manchester City has committed tax wrongdoing. It is asking HMRC whether the Premier League findings have implications that HMRC needs to investigate.
Still. Football investigation → Premier League report → Treasury Committee → HMRC.
Government. What an ecosystem!
Source: UK Parliament, Treasury Committee, 1 October 2026.
COMING DOWN THE TRACK
Prisoners are being released early. Parliament wants to know whether the system can cope.
New groups of prisoners began being released early on 1 October as part of measures intended to relieve pressure on prison capacity.
The Justice Committee isn't arguing that overcrowding can simply be ignored. Its concern is what happens next.
Does probation have enough capacity?
Is electronic monitoring effective?
Are services ready for larger numbers of people returning to communities?
Those aren't particularly glamorous questions. They are, however, the questions that determine whether an emergency measure relieves one problem or merely moves it somewhere else.
One to remember when this policy appears in the news again.
Source: UK Parliament, Justice Committee, 1 October 2026.
Also coming: did the Online Safety Act actually work?
The House of Lords Communications and Digital Committee is examining what happened after the Online Safety Act became law.
Not what politicians said it would do.
What it actually did.
The inquiry is looking at whether online services have become safer for UK users, how Ofcom has implemented and enforced the legislation, how platforms have responded and whether further changes are needed.
Its next public evidence session is on 13 October.
Watch this space.
Source: UK Parliament, Communications and Digital Committee.
THEY VOTED ON WHAT?
Nothing.
Well, presumably MPs voted on whether to have another biscuit somewhere, but there were no Commons divisions to report this week.
The House of Commons is in conference recess.
We're not padding the newsletter merely to make the heading earn its keep.
Moving on.
MOO OF THE WEEK
£233 MILLION. GONE BEFORE LUNCH.
There really couldn't be another winner.
Defra opened applications for the Sustainable Farming Incentive.
Budget: £233 million.
Applications opened.
Six hours passed.
Money allocated.
Applications closed.
And while most political attention was elsewhere, the Environment, Food and Rural Affairs Committee sighed, picked up their clipboards, and started asking farmers:
So... what the hell happened here, then?
That, ladies and gentlemen, is precisely why we're doing this.
Moo.
While You Were Watching Them Moo is an irreverent look at the work of the UK Parliament that doesn't always make the headlines. The jokes are ours. The underlying facts aren't. Wherever possible, we link to the original parliamentary material so you can check it yourself.
No party gets special treatment. If it's interesting, consequential, peculiar or buried beneath six hundred pages of parliamentary PDF, it's fair game.